Going Green, Getting Plastered
And introducing my new Portuguese name
Now that Portugal’s on the green list of countries UK tourists can visit (woohoo!), I’ve been mostly getting plastered and listening to podcasts…and I’ve decided to change my name.
And it’s not the first time I’ve had to do that.
In the US, Alastair is not a common name and so countless Starbucks servers poised with a pen above a cup would quizzically ask “Alison?” (girl’s name) or “Aniston?” (Jennifer?).
So, my Starbucks Name became Al. In the best traditions of Paul Simon (sorry Garfunkel) they could indeed call me Al.
But I’ve discovered that doesn’t work in Portugal – or at least in rural AL-entejo.
Alastair was providing a similar level of Starbucks confusion, and so I went for the default.
“AL? Inferno?” said the guy helping Lionel with the forest clearing.
He doesn’t know much English, but “hell” is one word he does recognise – I was confused the first time that happened, but now it’s become a pattern…and so I’ve gone back to my rugby name.
There’s some unwritten rule about rugby players adding a Y if it’s phonetically possible, and if there was no pre-existing nickname such as Gloria or Spike.
I was Aly on the pitch and in the clubhouse for many years from Manchester University to Northern, Northumberland and Marlow along with Frosty, Sharpy, Arnie, Stewie, Spotty, Oli and Kev (the exception that proves the rule). And Lee-y just sounds silly.
Despite the lack of rugby played in Alentejo, there is a linguistic foible which has echoes in Brazilian Portuguese that adds an EE to the end of lots of word, so I should fit in.
“Lionel-ee (as he first introduced himself)…I’m Aly…thanks for cutting so many of our trees down – it looks amazing.”
The week began slowly and only slightly plastered with champagne and sushi on the tenth anniversary of our first wedding.
(Note to self…we really have to plan a podcast episode on searching for the best Portuguese champagne/espumante in time for the tenth anniversary of our second wedding).
We’d bought backup mussels and clams (ameijoas) in case the sushi place was closed, and so shelfishly rolled the celebrations into a luxurious second day of feasting.
We treated ourselves to a low tide visit to our favourite secret beach which requires scrambling down a cliff face and so wasn’t appropriate for the big dog (sorry again Garfunkel).
It’s still spring enough for the beaches to be mostly deserted – especially the secret ones – and dipping sem roupa seemed the right thing to do.
Swimming in the Atlantic water was both a brazen dip and a bracing dip to my multilingual wife, and we sipped a beer from flamingos while watching nesting storks.
Our only disagreement on the day was the appropriate gemstone for a 10th anniversary.
Ana reliably informed me it was emerald, but Mr Google said it was tin or aluminium.
I’m not sure the kitchen foil lovingly tucked into the anniversary card with “you’re welcome” sharpied on it was as funny as I thought it would be.
Obviously I’ll be buying something appropriate when it’s easier to get around.
And when I say I’ve been getting plastered all week, it’s the guesthouse walls I have been attempting to plaster…but learning to mix powder and water with a power drill did mean most of it went over me to begin with.
We always planned to get both sides of our guesthouse (a two bed and a one bed apartment) looking great to match the views, but now we have a deadline set by the UK government (I love a deadline) and so the pressure is on.
Portugal felt a bit left out during the last round of travel bans, but the surge of British tourists expected now will be a real boost to the economy.
And never mind the Algarve…come and see us for a peaceful piece of countryside close to the sea in sunny Alentejo!
OK, advert over…back to the plastering…
Rui the Portuguese/Australian (who used up far too much of his patience teaching me the building basics while crafting our beautiful new porch) will be disappointed in me.
I cheated.
We are desperately keen to use up all the sand, gravel and cement that has been filling the foreground of our amazing view so long that we no longer see it.
And I have clearly been so well taught that I could have used all the above materials to repair the cracks exposed by some high-pressure paint scrubbing.
But nevertheless, I still bought something called A96 after Richard supplied me with plaster mesh.
What’s not to love about a little light scaffolding to keep badly mixed plaster glue in place?
It was still very much a three-day workout – as Richard promised it would be after he spent two weeks re-decorating his mum’s beautiful B&B in Portimão.
Obviously, the south facing sides of the house have taken a hammering from the sun and if a job’s worth doing…
The colourful plaster edgings to the base of the house and around the doors and windows – known as barras – needed the most urgent attention and I’m pleased to say Operation Plaster has now progressed into Operation Paint Job.
It’s not the prettiest series of 90-degree angles you’ll ever see, but there’s a satisfaction associated with flying solo!
And the podcasts? I’ve been listening to all sorts of audio geek stuff this week while working outside to try and get my mind back onto our wines podcast project which has suffered proportionately to the level of plastering.
The creativity received a real boost courtesy of Derek Day in LA who has composed an mazing theme tune for our travelogue series of wine discovery through Portugal.
The soundtrack to a summer adventure?
My podcast recommendations from this week (mostly courtesy of UK Audio Network emails) are anything from Cathy Fitzgerald who did an amazing series Life on Lockdown last year, and there’s more about her work on this episode of Telling Tales.
I loved the audio-geek rabbit holes of Twenty Thousand Hertz with all its deep dives into the man behind the Minecraft music, the 20th Century Fox fanfare and the history of the SM7 microphone (me? geeky? nah).
I also started exploring walking podcasts through this fun a melodic trip through Ibiza and discovered that if you want to hear walking podcasts there’s a place you can go for that.
Oh, and just by the way, my mother never liked it when people called me Aly. “It’s sounds like Ally-cat,” she used to say with a dismissive tut.
Better than being associated with hell though I suppose…and needs must.
PS. Anyone know how to sharpen knives really well? We have some nice ones we have picked up over the years but are looking for inspiring ways to sharpen them up so I can do myself more damage…more easily.
we forgot to look at my knive sharpening machine Tormek on your last visit. The rotating wetstone allows to grind a precise angle and then polish the edge to a mirror using the leather disk and polishing paste. I suggest you bring your valuable knives and after a short show of do's and don'ts you'll be spending the next couple of hours grinding and polishing. The steel (or in my case the ruby stick I showed you) is only for realigning the edge. Once the edge is gone there is no quick and easy fix but patiently grinding and polishing a new precise and regular edge.
Speaking as soldier and hobby chef, blades are sharpened with stone and steel. Killing and gardening edges are sharpened with stone. I only let steel near my kitchen knives. I've got gadgets but no longer use them. If you use ceramic wheels or gadgets that you draw the knife across, you end up with a wavy blade. I have a butchers steel. My knives are like razors. The secret is: little and often.