Springing into Summer
And the return of the drunken beetle cult
The metaphors have moved from walking through mud to battling thick undergrowth as the moment in the year has passed when the clay on our land turns to concrete.
A very wet winter has given everything an extra spurt of growth, and now that the days are getting longer and sun is getting stronger it’s a jungle out there.
The dogs have shed their muddy socks and now bring dust rather than wet pawprints into the house.
And the Scarab Cult are back – the annual bombardment of drunken beetles careering into the house and heading for “the flame...the flame” obsessed as they are with our gas stove.
Apparently they get smashed on honeycombs and then inexplicably make a beetle-line for the kitchen.
Simon the dog used to chase them, but these days the old man is more obsessed with bothering us and our neighbour Daniel for human food and snoozing than chasing bugs...however much he used to like the crunch.
We catch each one, try to persuade it that life is worth living and then launch it back into the wild hoping it can stay off the honeycomb, out of the hive-bars and not be lured back to the flame.
It’s that trimming strimming time of year again when I dust off the weed whacker and reacquaint myself with our land patch by daily patch...shedding a few pounds in the process.
The legal deadline for fire-prevention land-clearing within 50m of every building was thankfully pushed back until the end of May as usual, but it’s a time consuming business with more buildings built and temperatures rising.
A dodgy knee hasn’t helped, but there is something very calming about spending hours methodically clearing hillside patches of esteva (rock rose) and silves (brambles)...and the instant gratification that brings.
It’s nice to actually see the fruits of our labour as our indoor work is mostly sending messages out into the social media ether without the immediate feedback.
We’re fine-tuning our video and photography, delving into design software and experimenting with Facebook ads and Instagram reels to reach the people – that we know are out there – who will love the wonderful place we’ve created.
It turns out there’s more to it than just “build it and they’ll come.”
We had a crazy idea, made a plan, got a loan, learned how to build, how to install a fully off-grid power and water system for a small hotel and somehow beat the bureaucracy to open something truly remarkable...in record time.
Having retrained as builders and project managers, we are reinventing ourselves once again as marketeers, IT experts, accountants, social media super-spreaders, hosts, chefs, landscapers, gardeners and event organisers.
Now we’re working around the clock to manage everything and make it all work.
We’re fluctuating wildly between the fear of failing and having every confidence we’ll succeed – in the sense of having money coming in as well as going out, which I’m told is quite important.
We’ve been blown away by the people visiting us and staying with us who have been so brilliantly baffled by the beauty...and spontaneously asked why our prices are so low.
It’s our opening year and we really want expectations to be exceeded – and it’s hard on a website to do justice to the peace and quiet, all the nature and the open spaces.
And it’s great to hear from people even more convinced than we are that we can make a success out of this crazy adventure.
We are still caught deep in the weeds trying to get our booking engine activated, as connecting to the sites where people go to search for holiday homes has been an inexplicably uphill struggle.
A bad user always blames his bad user experience, but linking Booking.com, Expedia and AirBnB to our own “channel management system” has been the equivalent of cutting through a bamboo forest with a blunt blade.
Days of our lives we will never get back have been spent adding multiple photos and detailed descriptions, trying to avoid double bookings, one-night stays (due to cleaning costs), and dogs...at least for now, until Garfunkel and Albie get used to guests.
After weeks of helplines and service desks some apartments still aren’t appearing online and rooms people want somehow can’t be reserved.
It’s perhaps reassuring that the lower than expected booking numbers may be our own fault, but now we need bom dias on beds sooner rather than later.
In many respects we’re lucky the season hasn’t quite got started yet as it gives us time to finish things off properly and to do the noisy stuff every morning...like cutting the grass.
But it’s a nervous time for us first-time entrepreneurs and with loan repayments already fleeing our account, my childhood eczema is back and we’re both running around figuratively (and sometimes literally) shouting “Don’t Panic! Don’t Panic!”
We’ve realised the best way to settle our nerves is to create retreats we can plan for ahead of time – package deals including pickups and drop-offs, meals and activities.
There are far too many great yoga and wellness retreat centres in the neighbourhood, but with artist friends like Ed Sumner we’ve started proposing painting retreats and get-away-from-it-all weeks based around walking and wine.
There’s been a huge surge of people hiking the Rota Vicentina clifftop trails on this last wild coast in Europe, many stopping in a different place every night.
But we’re building a package plan to pick people up and drop them off each day so they can do stretches of the route while basing themselves in on place: in the Valley of the Stars.
I’d happily spend three or four nights walking in the morning, relaxing by the pool in the afternoon and then trying a local dish and a new Portuguese wine every evening...all while avoiding luggage logistics.
And if people aren’t obsessed with walking every single step of 200-plus kilometres of the Fisherman’s Trail or the Historical Way in a straight line, then the lovely circular routes nearby for some light hikes – or rides on bikes – can give structure to a very relaxing week.
So if any of this might be of interest to you or people you know please get in touch and we’ll test out some package plans.
As I write, the sun is already getting higher in the sky and the shrubbery isn’t going to cut itself, the scratching sound of a hungover beetle trapped in a plastic bag is calling for an intervention and Simon the dog wants some human breakfast.
We’re discovering how tough it is to get a business up and running from scratch when the personal stakes are so high.
But we’re also in a very beautiful place surrounded by pets and wildlife, a chorus of birdsong, and plenty of sunshine and wild beaches.
With the undergrowth cleared and the clay firm underfoot we have a pretty open path to our first summer season.
You will be frazzled as you learn the ropes but its a fabulous place and we can't wait to get back in August - and hopefully help you relax!